New memoir A God Awful God arrives December 8, 2026. Read the opening scene free

1–2 minutes

It’s 4:09 AM, But Somewhere Last Night…

It’s 4:09 AM, But Somewhere Last Night…

Somewhere last night:

  • a Nazarene pastor, only guilty of holy love, received news his career was over.
  • the devil smiled and demons danced.
  • accusers slapped each other on the back and hummed, “We are a glorious church without spot or wrinkle.”
  • a smoldering dumpster fire became a consuming fire.
  • old clergy wondered why they had spent their lives in the belly of the beast.
  • young clergy contemplated their escape plans.
  • relieved gatekeepers congratulated the committee for doing what had to be done.
  • 100 hymns about love were deleted from the hymnal.
  • the doomsday clock in the Church of the Nazarene ticked another minute closer to midnight.

But somewhere last night:

  • Jesus wept and the God of love had His heart broken again.
  • loving Nazarenes joined their voices with the ancients by the River of Babylon and “wept when we remembered Zion.”
  • we wished Nazarenes still focused on saving, not destroying.
  • we wanted to keep believing that love still wins and evil won’t.
  • love took a hit and faltered, reeled, moved to the back pew.
  • God reminded us He IS love.
  • And out of the darkness the love of God will shine even brighter.
  • I want to believe. Lord help my unbelief.

Randall Hartman

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Randall Hartman was a pastor for nearly forty years. He writes about faith, fear, and finding a God worth trusting. More about Randall